!! Our next raid date is January 24th !!
!!!!SOON WE WILL BE MOVING STUDIOS!!!!
!!We must plan our next raid!!
!!We're reviving our church!!
!!We now have healers for our army, feel free to join!!
WE HAVE CHURCH RANKS, CHECK 'EM OUT!
WE ARE NOW OFFICIALLY HOLDING A SHREK WORSHIP CENTER ON SUNDAYS, SO FEEL FREE TO JOIN (Routine down below)!
!!(Please don't harrass or bully the Onion Union soliders)!!
Hear yee, hear yee, the Shrek Empire is now official! If you are part of the Onion Union, you shall be escorted out of our camp and executed humanely, of course.
If you would like to be a Brogre/Ogirl, you shall say these 6 words. "Shrek is love; Shrek is life." and ask which rank you would like to be!
We shall give you an onion bazooka, swamp grenades, and (ocassionally) a Donk-e Tank.
Ranks of the Shrek Empire:
1st Lieutenant: @Dinogirl518
2nd Lieutenant: @Cyberwolff
2nd Captain: @pearlthegem
Church of Shrek center Shrekism routine:
1. We must pay our respects to Shrek by bringing 1 onion.
2. We must quietly enter the worship space
3. We must silently mourn those who have failed to praise His name.
4. We must make our way back to our seats
5. We must sing "All-star" or "Believer" in our Shrekist Choir
6. We must anoint our heads with onion juice and call upon Him
7.We must bow our heads unto the OgreLord, and praise Him
8. We must repeat "Shrek is love; Shrek is life"
9. We must leave the space quietly, and always have Him on our mind.
Choir leader: @PatchyTheCat
Shrek's Concise Teachings:
As long as you are loyal to our Mighty Ogrelord, all will be well in your life.
Onions are the Way, the Truth, and the Swamp.
All praise is due to Shrek, lord of all the Onions. All holidays and festivities are due to His power.
Not following the Way of Shrek, or defiling His Holy Name, will result in punishment.
The Shrek Commandments
I ~ Thou shalt order extra onions.
II ~ Thou shalt be a brogre/ogirl for eternity.
III ~ Thou shalt not disrespect His Swamp.
IV ~ Thou shalt not ask the Almighty Shrek to "do the roar".
V ~ Thou shalt not praise Farquaads, Wreck-it Ralphs, or Onion Union Lords etc...
VI ~ Thou shalt not say that Pixar is better than Dreamworks.
VII ~ Thou shalt not speak Thy Lord's name in vain. (eg. "Shrek is Dreck")
IX ~ Thou shalt be only loyal to the OgreLord.
X ~ Thou shalt accept the Almighty Shrek as the True Leader
XI ~ Thou shalt not be mad n' jelly bro.